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While you’re working on the appearance of your blog, take a second and go check out what’s “appearing” in my latest blog post: http://myuiiblog.blogspot.com/2012/03/take-hint-already.html
I found your blog through your sister’s post at UII. And I’m so glad I did! She is right, there are great insights here about the Aspie. But there is also an intrinsic level of humor here that makes me want to keep reading for my own enjoyment. Thank you for sharing your mind with the rest of us!
My nephew has Autism and it was originally because of him that I was interested in your site. (As I mentioned in another comment, I’m getting a lot out of it just for me!).
I love Puzzle Man and am very excited to see this campaign and your correlating efforts. As someone with Invisible Illness, I can attest to Jenny’s selfless support of many – she is well deserving of your first Puzzle Pride Award.
And yes, I do wish I were as awesome as you!
Ironically, this was equally as stressful to read now as it was to live through at the time. Don’t sell yourself short good buddy, you have made great strides even if it seems like consistent trip and falls to you.
Very well said. Words to live by.
Just found your blog. I am the mom to an Aspie who will be starting middle school next year. I find your blog comforting. You see I see you going through some really tough times dealing with things that even NT kids your age deal with that are tough. The point is you are dealing and Living your life and yes that to me is comforting. I wish I could protect my boy from heartache and disappointment… But that is not life. You my friend have a great attitude. Life is what we make of it. I tell my boy all the time that he has Aspergers but it doesn’t have to have him. You are living proof of that. Remember that.
Okay one little mom advice to you as far as your student loans… Call the loan company and tell them you are not working and they will give you an extension. Your loan will still acquire the interest but you can take 6 months to a year without having to make payments. As long as you do it before your first payment is over due and are upfront they will work with you.
Thanks for speaking do honestly and openly.
The very proud mama to another Aspie
Great Blog. Keep up the good work.
What a terrific idea of Puzzelman award. I wonder if more than one can get it each year. Keep up the good work and give yourself a puzzelman award.
I really appreciated your post. It has bothered me that the shooter’s autism was mentioned seemingly as an explanation for what happened. There are many, many people in our community somewhere on the spectrum and they don’t shoot anyone. Many of them do well in careers such as IT to refer to another aspie stereotype. You might like my post on this subject. I have a six year old daughter and have shared her world view as a tribute to the children who lost their lives and the survivors who have lost their innocence.
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You have given a very thorough evaluation of this whole situation. I like your explanation of meltdowns vs. tantrums. It must have been difficult to share some of this info, yet I believe that beyond being cathartic, it brings some value to the pain you have endured and worked through earlier in your life. This is valuable writing JD. I am proud of you, son.
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I am happy to see new ideas about acceptance resonated for you. Check out my blog about the training you were a part of at http://www.drrobertnaseef.wordpress.com
There’s always a higher reason for disability, I believe.
You always have a choice when it comes to managing emotions: You either control them or let your emotions control you. The way I was raised was that anger should always be the last resort no matter what. You may not be able to keep a cool head all the time but you can always do damage control and minimize the negative impacts. I really hate seeing the people I care about feeling upset, sad or angry so that serves as the conscientious motivation for me to never say or do anything that will make them feel that way.
Very good piece here. I want to add not everything that annoys you or “pushes you buttons” has to be dealt with, at least not while emotions are in control. Best to take a couple of slow breathes then ask yourself is this situation really that important that it has to be dealt with at this moment, do you really have to deal with it at all or will life go on regardless of this situation?
Of course life will go on and most issues that get “under to your skin” don’t have to come to a conclusion at all. Sometime, which is to say, most of the times, one only has to be heard and a reply isn’t necessary except maybe to acknowledge hearing it. Not everything has to come to a conclusion, even though you would like it to them and there, let alone at all. If something someone says bothers you to the point that you get “out of sorts” or emotional, that’s when you need to (mentally) review your check list.
1. Will it change anything ?
– probably not.
2. Does it have to be responded to or can it just be acknowledged ?
3. Is it a matter of extremely high importance?
– probably not.
4. Is it a matter of life or death?
– once again, probably not.
It may seem like it’s of high importance to you, but it’s not worth your “time” or “energy” to fuss over it.
This is just a thought and does not cover a lot of issues that come your way, but if you can use this checklist as a guide, it’s bound to have a positive effect on your overall emotional state.
Love you always-
Actually, I don’t think I could respond you this without more information – specifically, what do you do next? When imagine Happy Stranger angry, do you plan what you would do? Do you work through scenarios of what they might do and how others including you would react? Do you envision detrimental outcomes? Are you even a participant in the imagined scenarios? Your answer to these questions would, I think, trek us much more clearly whether it’s healthful empathy, idle random thoughts, or pathological.
It’s just more of a passing thought, but as it passes, the person could be crying, or screaming, or insert whatever-negative-emotion here. It’s always preceded by the thought, “I wonder what this person is like upset/angry?” I’m never involved in these scenarios, either. It’s just this person being upset or angry. And it disturbs me that my mind does this. It’s all of this combined that leads me to believe its a pathological behavior on my part, and I was wondering if it happens to anybody else, or if it’s unique to just me. I’ve known for years that I’m an angry codger of a man, but this is the first time I’ve publicly revealed enough of a glimpse to extrapolate the full extent of my inner rage. Let me just say this here and now: I DO NOT LIKE BEING AN ANGRY RAGE-AHOLIC. I DO NOT LIKE IT, SAM-I-AM. I DO NOT LIKE IT ANY MORE THAN I LIKE GREEN EGGS AND HAM. Anger really takes a lot out of a person, and God knows I’m exhausted enough in a day…
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